Wellbeing

How to Recognise Bullying (Not Just the Obvious Kind)

Bullying isn’t always physical or loud. It can be subtle ongoing and psychological.

🧠 Bullying Can Look Like

🔴 Direct / Obvious

• Insults name calling or mocking
• Physical aggression or threats
• Shouting or verbal intimidation
• Stealing hiding or damaging your belongings

🟠 Social / Relational

• Exclusion from group activities or chats
• Spreading rumours or gossip
• Turning others against you
• “Joking” that feels targeted or humiliating

🟡 Covert / Subtle

• Being constantly ignored dismissed or interrupted
• Eye rolling sighing or sarcasm at your ideas or presence
• Talking about you in front of you not to you
• Setting you up to fail (e.g. giving wrong info not sharing updates)

🟣 Authority Driven (in uni or placements)

• Being unfairly singled out or given impossible workloads
• Gaslighting or undermining from a tutor supervisor or peer mentor
• Threats to academic standing for asking for help or accommodations

🧠 Note. If you are neurodivergent you might second guess yourself. “Am I overreacting?”

The rule of thumb. If it feels consistently unsafe belittling or isolating it matters.

🛡️ How to Deal with Bullying (Safely & Strategically)

✅ Step 1. Log Everything

Start documenting.

• Dates times what happened who was involved
• Screenshots of messages emails or chats
• Notes on how it made you feel

Even if nothing comes of it immediately this protects you and gives you evidence if needed.

✅ Step 2. Set Clear Boundaries

If safe and depending on the situation you can try.

• “I don’t find those comments funny. Please stop.”
• “That’s not okay with me. I’d like us to keep it professional.”
• “I’m not comfortable with how you’re treating me. I need space.”

🗣️ If you’re neurodivergent and struggle with confrontation try written responses or practice scripts in advance.

✅ Step 3. Speak to Someone Safe

Choose someone you trust.

• A tutor academic advisor placement supervisor or student rep
• Disability or wellbeing support services at uni
• Your GP or mental health support if needed
• A trusted friend to validate your experience

You can say.

• “I feel like I’m being excluded or mistreated and it’s affecting my mental health.”
• “I’m experiencing behaviour I think may be bullying. Can I talk to you about it?”

✅ Step 4. Know Your Rights

In the UK universities and NHS placement providers are legally obligated to protect students from.

• Bullying
• Harassment (including ableism sexism racism)
• Discrimination (including against neurodivergence or disability)

🔹 You have the right to.

• Report bullying formally through your uni’s complaints process
• Request to change placement areas or modules
• Access reasonable adjustments (e.g. different group work more time)

💬 Emotional Coping Advice

For your mental wellbeing.

• Remind yourself. Their behaviour is about them not your worth
• Take space and regulate (music walks grounding techniques)
• Use affirmations or self soothing. “I am safe. I am allowed to set limits.”
• Surround yourself with people who respect and support you
• Journal or voice note to process feelings safely

🧠 For Neurodivergent Students in Particular

✅ Green Flags. When a Relationship Isn’t Bullying

It’s not bullying if.

• Someone makes a mistake and genuinely apologises
• You feel able to be yourself without fear
• They respect your “no” without pushback
• You leave interactions feeling neutral or better not drained or anxious

🔚 Summary List. What You Can Do

• 👁️ Spot the patterns. Don’t excuse repeated harm
• 📝 Keep records. Protect yourself
• 🛑 Set boundaries. Even simple ones
• 🗣️ Talk to someone safe. You’re not overreacting
• ⚖️ Know your rights. Formal complaints are valid
• 🧘 Support your mental health. Your wellbeing matters more than their approval